i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
