if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
