Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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