hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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