theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Randomize
