and you said cock pushups were impossible
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
