i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Randomize
