its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
