she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
Randomize