super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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