I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize
