I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
