I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
