Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Randomize