Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
