idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Randomize
