i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
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