that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Randomize
