I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
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