Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
I came so hard my ears popped.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Randomize
