"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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