I think my vagina is haunted
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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