Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
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