just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
