I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Randomize
