he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I miss vodka workout Fridays
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
not ubering you a puppy
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
