Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
You are a genius and a whore.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
