I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
