I wannas sexs uuuuu
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
Randomize