All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
