Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize