I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
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