this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
