It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
