is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
