I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
