i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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