We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
