I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
