You were right. It hurts to walk today.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
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