ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize
