ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
