I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize
