This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
