were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
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