does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
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