she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
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