all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize
