Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
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