is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
