is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
I have feelings that need drinking.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize